"Let me get this straight," Remus said dryly. "You're inviting me to a neo-pagan sex orgy, with flagellation as a side dish. In Rome. For Valentine's Day."
Sirius blinked. "Er, yes. Kind of. Damn, I knew you'd take it all the wrong way."
"Explain to me the correct way to take your proposition that we should to go to an orgy and spank people. Or did you want to be spanked yourself? And Lupercalia - do you need protection from wolves?" Remus' eyes sparkled and he struggled to keep his face emotionless.
"You prat," Sirius chuckled, shoving Remus lightly in the side. They had a brief mock-wrestling match in the bed and lost both pillows over the edge. Sirius ended up on top, for once. He quirked an eyebrow and grinned salaciously down at his lover, who pushed against him ineffectually.
"Get off, you big oaf, I can't breathe."
Sirius heaved a long-suffering sigh and rolled to the side. "Fine. May I start over, then? How would you like to go to Rome for Valentine's Day?"
"Oh, Sirius, how exotic!" Remus mock-swooned. "I'd love nothing more than a romantic Roman holiday." He fluttered his eyelashes.
Sirius grinned. "Good." Mild snogging ensued.
"Unless of course you'd rather meet up with a host of people we don't know and spank and shag some of them," Remus teased, with more fluttering eyelashes.
"You know, it just creeps me out when you do that thing with your eyes. You don't do poncy nancy-boy very well; you're too much the virile wolf-man type."
"Fine. I'll be serious. You won't like it though," Remus warned, sitting up against the headboard and rearranging the blankets so they covered him. "Going on holiday; good idea and I'm for it. To Rome, fine; never been there and have no objections. But for Lupercalia…" he trailed off meaningfully.
"And what do you know about it, Professor Moony, sir?" Sirius asked. "Less than you think, I bet."
A scowl. "It's an old pagan fertility holiday that devolved into debauchery fests during the Empire period, and has recently been enthusiastically re-embraced by neo-pagan Muggles as an excuse for indulging in kinky sex." Pause. "Why do you want to go?"
"What, the spankings and the sex with strangers aren't reasons enough?"
"Deviant."
"You're no fun."
"I am tons of fun," Remus replied in a lofty tone of voice he could only have picked up through excessive exposure to Snape during his recent year teaching at Hogwarts. The auditory resemblance made Sirius cringe momentarily until his lover continued, "In fact, I came across an amusing affliction recently: Luposlipaphobia - the fear of being pursued by timber wolves around a kitchen table while wearing socks on a newly waxed floor."*
Sirius grinned. "All right. You are fun. Just leave the fluttering eyelashes and Snape impersonations out," he said with a shudder.
"Not even if I combine the two?"
"Yuck. Hold on a moment while I get one of those pillows to bash you properly for making me think of what that would look like, you mangy cur."
"Pot. Kettle." Remus gave him quite a stare. "Mr. BLACK," he grinned, and began to hum "I'm a little teapot."
"Now, seriously," Sirius said, ignoring both the pun and Remus' smirk. "Do you really object to going to a Lupercalia festival in Rome or not?"
"I guess not. I just… Why do you want to go?" Remus asked, his hazel eyes penetrating Sirius' cobalt ones. "I mean, we've never made any declarations of monogamy; I just didn't know you wanted… variety." He looked uncertain for a few moments before faking a bit of a laugh and offering, "And if you wanted a spanking all you had to do was tell me so and then be extra naughty."
Sirius blushed. "Well… Not that I'd object to, er, seeing what that's all about…" He cleared his throat. "I'm not interested in fucking anyone else. But… I was thinking it would mean something. Lupercalia," he somewhat specified at Remus' querying look.
"Are you pagan, then?"
A shrug. "Not really. I just thought... I had an idea. A surprise. For you."
Remus gave him another of those long, penetrating looks, as if evaluating Sirius' soul for truthfulness.
"All right. I'll go," he agreed, somewhat reluctantly. "But I'm not sharing you with anyone," he added, grabbing Sirius and pulling him back down to a position more conducive to amorous intents.
Remus fell out of the fireplace at the apartment they had rented after lunch and crawled across the floor to the bed. "Gods, I HATE flooing long distances. I always feel like I've left the contents of my stomach a few thousand miles back."
Sirius dusted the soot off of him and started removing Remus' robes in a manner that he hoped was more helpful than lascivious. "I always forget you haven't as much experience travelling as I. Sorry, Moony." He helped his lover into bed and then fetched a glass of water for him.
"Thank you, Paddy," Remus said, putting the glass down on the credenza. "I'm just going to take a nap, all right? So I'll be rested for this evening. Wake me in a few hours, please?"
Sirius kissed his forehead. "OK. I'm going to go explore a bit," he said, closing the shutters to block out the light. "I'll be back before tea." Sirius left, grinning to himself. A few hours would be more than enough time for him to scout out the area and make the arrangements he needed to.
As the sun set, they walked with a growing crowd up to the Palatine hill, through the ruins. The old Lupercalia ritual was going to be reenacted in a usually-off-limits cave, complete with animal sacrifice and loincloth-clad youths. The crowd was a mix of pagans, locals, and tourists, both Muggle and Wizard alike. As they walked up the hill, Remus asked about the Muggles mixing with the wizards so freely.
Sirius shrugged. "It's a very small wizarding community here, what with the Catholic Church and all. That's part of the reason they're so serious about Lupercalia; they need all the fertility they can get, here! And the Muggle Streghe are almost exclusively the ones who give birth to Muggle-born witches and wizards, so they know all about each other and mix pretty thoroughly. It's like having a Ministry official or doctor in the family, for them to have a witch or wizard. And the local wizards recognize how helpful it is to have the Muggle Streghe on their side, that it makes their lives that much easier… Think of all the problems we'd solve in England if we had that kind of relationship with even a subset of the Muggle population."
The ceremony began with a brief statement from one of the priestesses about the origins of the traditions. The ritual they were recreating was an interweaving of several elements, including the veneration of a deity who protected the flocks from the wolves, as well as the she-wolf who adopted the ancestral heroes of Rome. It was also a ritual to purify and prepare for the spring just ahead, and encourage the fertility of the crops and the community.
Then the ceremony started and the priests, the Luperci, entered. Remus wondered if they were cold, clad in only loincloths and sandals. He noticed that Sirius was enjoying the young men's nudity a bit too obviously and elbowed him in the ribs.
Two goats and a dog were "sacrificed": Remus was pleased to note that the animal welfare people had seen to it that the animals were small stuffed fleece ones. A bowl of blood from the slaughterhouse aided the somewhat disturbing effect of the massacre of the toys, and at the end some blood was dabbed onto two youths' foreheads (stand-ins for Remus and Romulus - at which Sirius snickered). Next came a symbolic purification of the youths, done by washing away the blood with wool dipped in milk. Then the two young men laughed heartily; no one knew why, but the priestess/narrator assured them it was tradition.
Finally, the youths and priests were given goat-hide thongs, and they ran through the assembled crowd, amidst much laughing and shrieking, lightly whipping the presented palms of anyone who wanted either purifying for the new year to come, or fertility, or both. Everyone ambled down the hill, laughing and still occasionally being flogged by an overzealous Luperci, to a communal feast of antipasto and enormous casks of wine.
"Well, what did you think?" asked Sirius eagerly.
Remus wasn't sure what Sirius wanted him to say. He settled for a neutral, "It was very interesting."
"Do you think we'll be protected from wolves, then?" Sirius teased. "Really, though, perhaps it will help with your transformations."
"Perhaps," Remus answered, wondering. He'd never heard of any Italian werewolves.
"Or maybe we'll just both be extra fertile," Sirius prattled. "Wonder if that means one of us is going to get magically knocked up or if we'll just be extra horny?"
"Is that possible? Could you be MORE randy?" asked Remus, aghast.
"Git."
"Hey, you chose to live with me. Not my fault," Remus rejoined smugly, leaning in for a tender kiss that belied their banter.
At the end of the feast, a woman stood and announced that the Casa di Stregani, and the three houses it shared a small piazza with, would be hosting the evening parties this year, and that all were welcome to attend. Sirius grinned and leaned in to whisper, "The real festivities start after sunset, indoors."
"Great," Remus replied dryly, "I knew the ritual couldn't be all of it."
Sirius rolled his eyes and grabbed his lover by the elbow. "Come have supper with me, Moony, and then we'll go."
After a light meal, they made their way back through the narrow streets to an elegant villa. An old woman took their cloaks and gestured them into the house. A steady dance beat thrummed from a room off to the side and drinks were pressed into their hands before they could even greet the hostess, a lush young woman in an obscenely low-cut gown. She threw her arms around Sirius and kissed him wetly.
"Ah, Sirius, carissimo! So wonderful to have you in Rome again! You MUST visit me more often!" she gushed, clinging to the man like an octopus. "And is this your buon amico, Remus, the one you mentioned this afternoon?"
Remus shook the hand she reluctantly disentangled from Sirius' neck, trying not to growl at her. "Pleasure. And you are?"
"Marcella. An old friend of Siri's," she cooed, kissing Sirius' cheek again.
Remus glared.
Sirius apologetically disentangled himself from his "old friend" and took up Remus' uncooperative hand to hold. "Thank you for your help earlier today, Marcella; I really appreciated it."
"Of course! Anything for you, love. Now dance, drink, enjoy the party! And then try out the other houses and have some fun there, too! Go on!" she commanded, winking knowingly.
"Always good to see you," Sirius said, kissing her cheeks.
"I'll find you later, and you can see even more!" she giggled suggestively. "Arrivederci! Love you!"
"Love you, too," Sirius called over his shoulder as she pushed the two men into the dance room.
They danced for a while, Remus humming with mild irritation. A steady stream of men and women were eyeing Sirius appreciatively and occasionally one would pull him away from Remus to dance. "Stay away," Remus thought at them, "Mine!" but they kept coming back for more. Sirius seemed oblivious, happily dancing with everyone. Finally Remus' irritation got the better of him, and he left to hold up the wall and just watched, drinking steadily.
Why was he so furious? Sirius got hit on all the time. So did he, for that matter; they were both attractive men. Why on earth was he so jealous tonight, he wondered.
"Love you, too." Sirius' cheerful voice floated through his head. Sirius had never said that to him. Ever. But Remus never said it either. It had become a contest of wills, almost, or something equally childish. He hid behind his stubborn refusal to say it first, not wanting to admit to the underlying fear that loving Sirius would mean being very vulnerable. Being with him felt different than being with anyone else ever had. More right. More real. Frightening. It was one more fear Remus didn't need, especially in these uncertain and dangerous times, with Voldemort returning to power.
Sure, they had other endearments for each other, pet names, and had lived together like an old married couple for the last year or so, since Dumbledore sent Sirius to his house. They both often said "I love being with you" and "I love it when you nibble right there on my neck" and "I love how you're always so bloody grouchy in the morning." But never just a simple, straightforward, unadorned "I love you." Ever.
Remus was damned if he was going to say it first, however much he felt it. He'd been the one to oh-so-casually mention his bisexuality in conversation over lunch one day. He'd also been the first one to make a move physically, kissing Sirius after a wrestling match straight out of the Marauder-era to see who would give in first over some silly quarrel. It had been all in jest, but they were both distant for days, tiptoeing around each other, wondering what the kiss meant.
Remus had even been the one to take things farther, helping Sirius strip off his sodden robes after being caught in a downpour one evening. He didn't stop at the robes, but kept determinedly removing clothing, and met Sirius' uncertain gaze with a kiss before stepping back and removing his own clothes in a clear invitation. Which had luckily not been refused.
No, he felt he'd done enough of the first moves. This time it was Sirius' turn.
Finally a breathless and sweaty Sirius joined him at the wall. "You're angry."
Remus downed the contents of the glass in his hand. "No. I'm jealous. But I'm sorry, and I'll try to get into a more festive mood." He kissed the other man. "Shall we check out the other parties, then?"
Leaving their cloaks, they left the sounds of the dance floor behind them and stepped out into a square garden, surrounded by old-fashioned, small houses. They crossed a narrow path and came to the next house. As they went into the anteroom of the second house, a young woman instructed them that they were to select a mask for the evening, if they wished to participate.
"Participate in what?" Remus inquired warily.
"Just take one, you twit," Sirius laughed, nudging him towards the masks, "It can't be that bad." There were three baskets of demi-masks, one of goats and sheep, one of wolves of varying ferocity, and the final collection of masks were of women with up-dos and ringlets, obviously meant to be Roman noblewomen.
"What the hell…?" Remus started to ask as Sirius shoved a goat mask at him.
"Either loosen up and choose another one or I'll be forced to make you look like the old goat you're intent on turning into."
"Sod off," Remus said lightly, turning to select a particularly feminine mask. "See? I can have fun."
Sirius grinned and donned a not-so-innocent sheep mask. "Good. Now let's go see what this is all about."
They wandered through a room full of people in masks, standing in small groups and chatting animatedly, drinking wine and some kind of liquor that smelled of caramel. Remus noticed that the masks seemed to be giving the guests the freedom to obviously check out all the newcomers with unveiled sexual invitations in their eyes. He began to feel overdressed in the button-down shirt and trousers he'd worn to dinner. Sirius looked slightly less out of place, in a tight t-shirt that showed off his arms.
As they neared the center of the house, they noticed a large crowd milling around a table covered with glasses and bottles, and more curiously, parchment, quills, ink, and a large earthenware jar. "Let's get some drinks," Sirius suggested.
"Ah, Sirius, benvenuto!" a large man in a goat mask boomed as they approached the table. He grabbed Sirius by the shoulders and gave him loud kisses on each cheek. "You make a lovely sheep! And this delectable 'signora' must be the one you were telling me about!" Remus took a step back to avoid the embrace and offered his hand instead. The man seemed momentarily puzzled before shaking it, and continued, "And will you two be taking part in the lottery, then?" His eyes raked down Sirius body openly, "I know who I'll be asking Lupercus to give me, if you do!"
Sirius smiled and backed away a bit, feeling his lover start to tense.
"Here's some parchment for your names," the man said, offering them quills as well. "The drawing is in an hour," he said, winking.
"No, no, I think we're just looking, here. Thanks, though," Sirius shouted as Remus scowled and dragged him away.
"What kind of lottery is this, exactly?"
"Well, um, I think this is the one where people put their names in the jar and, um, go off with the new partner for a while."
Remus was clearly torn between wanting more information and chastising Sirius for bringing him there without telling him what to expect. The intellectual side won out over the hurt lover: "For how long?"
"Depends. I've heard of it being for just the night, up to a whole year." Sirius shrugged.
"And have you done this before? Do you or do you not want to participate tonight?" Remus voice was tight with controlled jealousy.
"I did it once, a long time ago. Just for the night." Sirius shrugged. "It was right after school ended. Seemed a bit more interesting than just randomly picking someone up at a party." He turned to look Remus in the eye. "And I told you: no, I'm not looking to be with anyone else tonight, only you. Stop being so defensive."
Remus' eyes narrowed and he growled, only half-audibly and half-consciously. "Can we go now?"
"Yes. I'm sorry; I suspected at least one of these parties would be a lottery but I didn't think it would upset you so much." They returned the masks to the baskets in the antechamber. As Remus started to grumble about going back to the other house for his cloak, Sirius interrupted him. "Don't you want to see what's happening in the other places?"
His hopeful tone of voice helped soothe Remus' irritation. Perhaps he'd been over-doing the possessive thing a bit. After all, no promises had been made between them. Remus took a deep breath and shrugged. "If you want to. I'll try to have a more open mind."
Sirius grinned and kissed him quickly. "Good. I think in the end, you'll see something you like," he hinted with a wink.
"In whose end, exactly?" Remus asked wryly, taking Sirius by the arm and propelling him out the back door and through the courtyard, to the next house.
The third "party" was, from the outset, clearly an orgy.
Floors were covered with mattresses and there was a basket at the end of each one filled with rubber gloves, condoms, and lubricants. At Remus' raised eyebrow, Sirius whispered an explanation that Muggles used them for preventing disease as well as pregnancy. The baskets also contained a variety of other implements being used throughout the room in various ways, from nipple clamps and restraints, to vibrators and suggestively carved vegetables, to honey dust and feathers.
They both seemed to be blinking a lot and trying not to blush. They walked silently through a few rooms, stepping over and around the mattresses and couches as they looked around and tried not to stare.
Sirius coughed quietly at the next arched doorway and mumbled, "I'm truly sorry. I, ah, didn't realize this was quite so… open. Let's go, then?"
Remus nodded. He was trying to be nonchalant and pretend that he wasn't uncomfortable, but he wasn't fooling Sirius. Best to just admit it and go.
As they passed the door, they each drew in a breath of the cool night air. Remus raised his brows inquisitively. "Well then. That was interesting." He blinked. "Never seen so many people having sex before. Bit of a shock, that." He looked up at the stars for a few minutes. "Interesting, though."
Sirius looked gobsmacked. Remus made a mental note to share some of his more… unconventional interests with his lover.
"Moony, are you a voyeur?"
"No," came the too-quick reply. A cough. "Well… No. I mean, that's the first time I've really, um, seen that. Other than breaking up the occasional students, of course. But I've never WATCHED them, you know." He shuddered. "Ugh."
"Really? Intriguing… Moony is a pervert," Sirius sing-songed under his breath. "Well, good. I didn't think you were really as uptight as you pretend to be, with that stick up your arse. Nice to know you're a true Marauder."
"I didn't realize 'Marauder' meant 'deviant,'" Remus laughed. "So, what are you going to show me next?"
Sirius' skin darkened in the moonlight.
"Are you blushing, Padfoot?"
"Of course not. I have no shame," Sirius boasted.
"I see. You do squirm though," Remus helpfully pointed out. "Deliciously."
Teasing grins turned into playful kissing and some mild groping, safe under cover of the night. Eventually they broke away, Sirius moving to stand behind Remus, arms around his waist, back to front, looking at the stars.
"It's always so cloudy this time of year at home. It's nice to see the stars again," Remus observed. Sirius made a noise in the affirmative. "So all this Lupercalia stuff… Seems somewhat in the same vein as the 'Lord of Misrule' traditions around the Winter holidays, yes?"
"Yes, a bit. I didn't really see anything connecting the two, in my research, but you could be right."
"Research? You?" Remus twisted in his arms to face him.
"That look of shock is not exactly flattering, Professor Moony, " Sirius said, scowling.
"Fine then. Take me inside and warm me up. I'm ready for anything."
"Are you sure?"
"Absolutely. Nothing will shock me any more than you have by admitting to having done research! Lead on, Professor Padfoot," Remus snickered
Sirius rolled his eyes in amused irritation. "All these good looks and a brain, too!" he joked, but it didn't quite cover his expression of hurt and uncertainty as they left the garden.
The back entry of the last house had a basket of what looked like rags for the guests, but turned out to be soft, wide leather strips attacked to short handles. Remus snickered and picked one up, Sirius looking at him questioningly as they went into the main chambers. These rooms were not crowded like in the last house, but each corner had been claimed either by couples or groups of three or more, while others wandered from room to room, watching. Remus noticed that Sirius looked extremely uncomfortable, yet flushed.
The groups in the corners made various tableaus and presented every combination possible, but all were variations on the theme of one or more of the men or women standing or kneeling with arms outstretched against the walls, being flogged with varying degrees of seriousness. Some tableaus were simply titillating; others significantly more sexual.
Not looking at him, Sirius took Remus' hand and they slowly made their way through the lower rooms of the house, pausing to look at each group. Sirius' hand seemed sweatier than usual, Remus thought. He casually leaned in and whispered teasingly, "You do want me to spank you, don't you?"
Sirius kept his eyes focused on the couple they were currently facing, a rather pale but powerfully built middle-aged man, striking a naked and blindfolded young man with olive skin and long black hair. When the leather straps smacked his flesh, he moaned and arched into it, erection moistening. Light pink stripes colored his thighs and hips. Sirius shivered and nodded, once, the barest downward jerk of the chin, in the affirmative.
"I told you, you've only got to ask," Remus continued, switching to the bedroom voice he knew always got Sirius going.
Still refusing to meet his lover's eyes, the other man shook his head slightly. Remus waited several seconds before Sirius managed to force out, "Can't ask. No."
Remus gave him a long look, which Sirius avoided. Interesting. Sirius was dead serious; he wanted it, but couldn't ask for it. This was no light-hearted sex play to him, and Remus suddenly wondered how much of this desire to explore bondage and pain had anything to do with Azkaban. Or maybe his inability to say that he wanted it was simply a matter of pride; perhaps part of him wanted to be humiliated, but the other parts were struggling against it. Maybe it was a battle of wills and control that Sirius wanted?
Suddenly Remus was not so opposed to the idea of helping his lover explore his unexpected interest.
"Shall I find us a free corner?" he whispered into Sirius' ear, gently licking and then biting.
A spectacular flush colored Sirius' face and Remus noted the now-substantial bulge in his lovers' trousers. For a second he wondered if he himself was ready to deal with what such explorations could do to their current relationship of carefully balanced equality.
But Sirius took a deep breath, finally meeting his eyes and quietly answered, "Not tonight," before kissing him gently, almost chastely, and leading him out the back door and into the gardens again.
As they gathered their cloaks from the first house, Remus mulled over the evening so far. What did Sirius really want? Sex with a stranger? More wildness? Why had he brought him here for this? What did this have to do with them?
"It's still a few hours until sunrise," Sirius said in a somewhat forlorn voice. "I know the, ah, parties, didn't really go so well. So, um, do you want to go back to the place where the ritual was?"
Remus shrugged his agreement. Sirius rambled on, "It's not a cave, really, it was a wolf den originally, in the days of the Etruscans. It was enlarged for the old Lupercalia festivals when Rome was no more than a collection of shepherds' huts, under the rule of Romulus. It's supposedly the same cave where the she-wolf suckled Remus and Romulus."
Remus was impressed. "Wow, you really have done quite a bit of research."
Sirius' expression was mildly hurt as he answered, "Yes, I told you I had." There was bit of a pause before he continued, switching moods, "So, I hope all the sex you just saw has got you in the mood for loving," as he pulled a small box out of his pocket.
Remus looked skeptical.
"Don't try to tell me that seeing all that didn't affect you," Sirius challenged.
Remus laughed, "No, but I'm not quite randy enough to fuck you on the hard floor of a cave. Sorry. You can wait until we get back to the flat."
Sirius set the box down and with a wave of his wand the bed from the apartment had sprung to full-size. He waggled his eyebrows, "How about if you fuck me on this, then?"
Remus sighed. "No. No sex, not here. Please. Let's go back." He looked around the cave walls. "It's just… it feels strange. To me. Here, in the cave."
Sirius' disappointment was palatable as he started to re-miniaturize the bed. "Take a look around the cave while I do this," he suggested.
Remus walked around the chamber, wondering if it had really ever been small enough for a den. Maybe. For a den with two humans in it, possibly. He kicked a pebble across the floor and noticed that there were a lot of them by his feet. And they formed an odd pattern. Remus squinted in the dim light. The rocks spelled out the words "Remus, te amo" on the floor of the Lupercal.
Sirius spoke quietly, wrapping his arms around him from behind, "I love you, Remus. Te amo." He paused, taking a deep breath. "I've never said that to anyone before."
"Sirius, I love you, too," Remus answered quietly
"No. I mean it. To anyone. Ever."
"Never?"
"No. I love you, Remus. Only you. Only ever you. Happy Lupercalia," Sirius whispered, pulling his lover close.
"Happy Lupercalia, Sirius," Remus answered between slow kisses, letting himself be pulled into Sirius' embrace. He pressed against his lover, rubbing their bodies together until he got a quiet moan in response. Remus licked along his slightly stubbly jaw and whispered into Sirius' ear, "Why don't you transform that bed into a rug and we can christen the Lupercal more appropriately?"
Sirius grinned, pulling out his wand and answered, "I love it when you let the wolf out to play."
Remus simply smiled as the bed became a furry rug, and pounced.
* Credit to the comic genius of Gary Larson
Sources about Lupercalia:
Were-wolf and Vampire in Romania by Harry A. Senn
Lupercalia MMIV - History
Lupercalia
Roman Religion - The Lupercalia
Whip My Roman Sex Gods
Thank yous: My Beloved Cindy Lou. Unending Gratitude to Betas Betty and Olivia Lupin - I couldn't have done it without you both!